In my quest for knowledge and communication with the faeries, I became aware of some ills...some things not quite right in my world. Oh, they seemed right from the outside. But when the surface was scratched a bit, I saw a dark underbelly of pain and saddness and anger.
I realized that I had used Faery Glamor to cover something.
I had made a castle out of a stone hut and manipulated my feelings to bring euphoric results to myself and others..
I have come to the conclusion that I may indeed, be a Faery Witch. A bit different than a Wiccan Witch, but still wonderful. I have some magic powers. Have had since I was a gifted child..
It is true that they are hard to control sometimes, and some days they get the better of me, can scare those around me, but I think this last bit has finally freed me of some of my own spell upon myself.
*I feel ill when I'm not out in nature.
*I adore all things Arthurian and Merlin related (hence my name itself),
*I can be fanciful and demanding, hard working and love to sing.
*People tell me how much they admire my singing voice, and that it soothes them.
*I sometimes move things or people with my mind.
*I have built dreams and torn them down in one evening.
*I give all I have in a relationship and spoil my partners and gift them and put them upon grand pedestals.
*I also require their devotion and faithfulness and am a very jealous lover.
*I am vengeful if I don't get my way.
*Yet I think of myself always as a giver and yet, I always think of the gypsy trade in anything, one thing left in place for another.
*I adore the stage and the floaty things of air, whether they be birds, butterflies, dragonflies or gossamer wings.
*I love to hide when I want to, and eavesdrop if at all possible, like a faery in the corner.
*Yet I love to burst upon the scene in full regalia and have everyone's attention.
*I hold a grudge, but can be easily convinced to let it go if given gifts.
*I am a good storyteller.
*I spent most of my youth and young adult hood outside and preferred it to any other place.
*I realized at a young age that trees and animals and even the elements have spirits and souls.
These are ALL Faery qualities.
Yes, I believe I am a Faery Witch. Which is why that ring came to ME out of all the people it could've gone to. I would never have come to this conclusion this soon without it.
In thinking about Faery Glamor and all its qualities, I thought about Midsummer's Nights Dream.
I am convinced now that I have used my powers on others...and even myself. I have, through my joy and reckless abandon, put spells upon them and convinced us both that we were in love, or in some faeryworld of hope and magic...when in sooth, he was only bewitched and woke with donkey ears, like in Midsummer Night's Dream.
When involved in Faery Glamor, there is nothing more delicious, nothing more delightful, nothing more real and yet, nothing more illusionary.
The Faery Ring has taught me that I can set and lift these spells at will.
I choose to now be very aware of the power that I have upon others. I will choose to use my magic in my songs and stories and to not use it on other fragile or damaged people, even if I think it may benefit them.
Granted, there is much to gain by using Faery Glamor. And the recipients may take many experiences and lessons back to their mundane world, albeit, they have lost a great deal of time while lost in fantasy.
They may remember fondly our time together, and then more and more vaguely, the magic that was, until one day it will only be a dream, a thought, a moment of a smile, or a lost feeling.
Like Titiana, I am totally obsessed at the time, all engulfed by the magic of the moment...then awake from my dream, slowly blinking to the new day of reality as Oberon's love potion has worn off, and I find myself back to myself again.
The story can not be repeated. Nick Bottom will wonder what happened, then he will wonder no more, as his life of work and self consumption and apathy towards others and love of self will once more become his familiar theme.
And I, like Titiana will find myself still in love and lust and always at odds with Oberon. :)
1 comment:
There is such a lyrical quality to your writing :)
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