Pirate Goddess Empowerment

It's PIRATES Weekend Coming up at the Sterling Faire!

And you know what that means!
YAARR!
Wild Pirates and Sassy Buxom Pirate Wenches!

Well, I be "Merlyn, Captain O' The Lusty Avenger"

and I be hither t' tell ye to stand t' attention mates and take note!

There shall be NO lolly gaggin' aboot!

I am sick t' DEATH o' pansy arsed, lily fingered, mealy mouthed, forked tongued, work shirkin' stallin', double dealin, mewling, excuse makin' and self important devilish scallywags.

If'n ye be up t' sailin' wi' me ye HAS t' have a strong stomach, I say...

AYE...

and HEART.

If'n ye HAS one.....

(TBD) 


Ye has t' BE what ye say ye are, or ye shall be called out fer a much deserved lashin'.


Only stout hearted, loyal, fun, dependable men and women
(notice I dinna say "ladies" :)...........
need apply.


Know ye...that Harry has INDEED proven his'self t' be a top notch Mate,


but we here aboard the Lusty Avenger..... need lots o' sailors aboard!!

We'll be singing MANY o' shanty and piratical ballad and lusty ditty this weekend thither!!


Ye also has t' CHASE ME in The Lusty Avenger cuz I'm tired o' chasin yer hairy white arses.


I may or may not give ye pause.


I may not e'en deign that ye be worth club haulin' fer.

In the past, if'n I've wanted a man, I've gone out and got him, by jaysus.

Nothin' wrong in that I tell thee.

Have had a few fun romps in the bargain....I regret it not.

Well.... mostly not....

But I'm not in the mood anymore fer courtin'.

I be in the mood fer floggins.


AYE!

We'll be havin' FIVE shows a day all around the Shire!
Oh and I want to highly recommend to ALL women out there,
the book that's got me sooo fired up this day.

By Greg Behrendt and Liz Tuccillo called: 

"He's Just Not That Into You: The No-Excuses Truth to Understanding Guys" 

In SOOTH....

No matter if'n ye be Single, Married, Divorced, Trolling, Sworn off men....

HOW many o' us o' the beauteous female sort hast said the following:

"I just don't understand Men!!!"

(Followed usually by some sort O' Piratical sound like this: "Arghrhggrgh!! )

AYE. 

Right feckers they be sometimes. 

(my disclaimer hither is "SOME men are not ALL men") 

(aye.....ee'en Harry has 'is moments........but he knows it.... and when they happen.....

I do tell 'im often. Just ask 'im  :) 

He can also be a dear, and I do love him right well....

He be a keeper.

I started reading this book t' day whence I picked it up in port and I couldn't put it down, but had to in order t' set sail in time~

It's an amazing insight into that odd bunch......

MEN.

There ARE good men out there....it's up t' us t' weed 'em out from the shite.

 I also received an inspirational GIFT today....

e'en as my blood boiled like a hot spring in anticipation o' the weekend~

It were a DRUM!!

A Beauteous GODDESS DRUM~

 From a Goddess..... 

TO a Goddess.

(That be ME :)

And so it is that I may indeed bang a drum and march t' the beat o' me own drummer this day and many more.

It may ee'en beat a right nice time fer a floggin'. 

Fair Winds and Take NO QUARTER!

 



No comments: